Is Not Telling the Truth the Same as Lying?

As a kid you are taught that not telling the whole truth is the same as lying.  This was ingrained not only from my parents, whom I believed used it as a ploy for us to tell them the whole truth, but it was also enforced by my catechism teacher.  


It was commandment number eight that stuck out, mainly because I didn't understand what it meant.  'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.'  To a seven year old that means absolutely nothing.  My neighbor was a little old lady who knit me sweaters, I never did anything false against her.  And at seven years old, what could I really be doing that was sin worthy. The teacher translated it as 'Do not lie,' which went hand in hand with number four, 'Honor your father and mother.'  And then I understood it.  The teacher further explained that not telling the whole truth is the same as lying.  By leaving important facts out, you are essentially not being totally honest, and you know it.  It was a lesson I have always held on to, and eventually questioned.  


As adults you never tell the whole truth.  You don't want to hurt the other person's feelings, you want to protect your friendship, your relationship, there are several reasons why we keep from telling people the whole truth.  But should we withhold information from those that are closest to us?  Our best friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, spouse.  Is it part of the unwritten trust code that we will always tell them the complete truth? Otherwise, if they find out the extracted information, is it then a lie?  And which is worse?  My mother always said, that if I told the whole truth, I would not get in trouble.  I don't think that's true for adults.  There is always a repercussion with not telling your closest loved ones the whole truth.  And if the truth doesn't eventually come out, the guilt will get to you.  At least, that's what my catechism teacher would have said.   


Note: Not telling the whole truth is the same as lying, depending on the relationship with the person you're keeping the information from.

Character Creating

As a writer, I sometimes feel like I am a psychologist.  As I dig into the minds of my made-up characters, I ask myself, what made them choose this?  Is there something from their childhood that can justify these actions?  What was their home life like growing up?  I do a brief outline of their lives from childhood, up until where they are now, in the world that I created.  What has shaped them into this person?  What are their beliefs and morals?  As I dig deeper into their psyche, I think about how their supposed past has shaped this person I have now created.  These things may not ever come up in the story, and it may prove to never be relevant in the plot line, but it helps me understand them as realistic characters in my fictitious world.  I am creating the character of a true to life person.      


When I try to understand the people in my own life, I go about it in the same way.  Why would they be acting like this?  What has happened in their life that has made them act and react in this manner?  Whether it is a good quality, or bad, there is always something that has shaped the traits that we hold.  And our experiences are constantly altering these innate characteristics.  Sometimes it's as simple as someone showing you a little bit of hope or encouragement, for you to see a more positive side to yourself.  Just like the characters in a story, those encounters, or scenes in our lives, alters what happens next.  But it's an outcome that can't be re-written.  


Note:  If I have to ask myself, what does this character want?  What is his goal?  Then I should be asking that of myself, and my 'character.'        

Roaming Around Rome

Rome is the eternal city.  Although tourists, including Italian tourists, travel in droves like it is disappearing in the modern era.  The ancient Romans said, no matter what happens in the world, Rome will go on forever, and thus they named it the eternal city.  Everyone comes to Rome to see the ancient ruins.  It's like watching the history channel in real life.  After going to the Roman Forum and the Colosseum, the Vatican and Saint Peter's Basilica, the Sistine Chapel, and the Pantheon, travel to the sites a little less frequented.  And don't be afraid to get lost.


Here are my top eight places to roam in Rome:


1. The Trevi Fountain is a huge tourist spot, but it's a must see, especially if you want to make a wish, and hope that some day you will return to Rome.  Just make sure you don't nail someone with your coin as you toss it overhead.  And don't try to reenact the scene from La Dolce Vita, there are too many tourists and it won't have the same aesthetic.   

The Trevi Fountain

Federico Fellini's La Dolce Vita

2. Via Condotti is the Rodeo Drive of Rome.  The narrow cobblestone road has the same great shops and boutiques housed in ancient buildings, which lead off from the Spanish Steps.  Although I did not buy anything, it was nice to stroll the street as opera singers and a full orchestra played live from the Spanish Steps.  Only in Italy would this be so authentically set.

The Spanish steps from Via Condotti

3. Climb the famed Spanish Steps, a local and not so local hang out, to the Hassler Roma.  One of Rome's most luxurious hotels, it was the place of residence and filming for Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday.  A relaxing lunch at the peaceful garden Palm Court restaurant is a nice oasis from the bustling city.

Dessert from Palm Court

4. Giolitti has absolutely the best gelato I have ever tasted.  As the oldest gelateria in the city, it's no wonder it's so good.  With it's perfectly creamy texture and tons of flavors to choose from, Giolitti beats any gelato stand or shop in the city.

Giolitti Gelatoria

5. Cafe Sant'Eustachio is a local favorite for the best espresso drinks.  Order standing up like the Italians, or have a seat and take in the passersby in the open piazza.  But be aware, you do have to pay an extra tax for the seat.

A Latte from Cafe Sant'Eustachio

6. Escape the ridiculous crowds at the Vatican, and head to the Basilica of Santa Maria Maggiore, where the magnificent beauty is awe inspiring.  Built in the 5th century, the gilded ceiling is said to be made from the first gold brought over from the New World.  It is one of the oldest and most beautiful churches in the city.

Basilica of Santa Maria Maggiore

7. Walk through Traiano Park to get to the Colosseum.  I stumbled upon this little park as I was in search for a way to cut across the city.  As I got to the top of the pathway, the Colosseum came into sight between the lush green trees.  It's a new perspective of the monument, which is far more beautiful than seeing it from the busy main entrance.

Traiano Park

                 

8. Roam the Streets of Roma.  Put down the map, and get lost.  There are so many quaint alleyways and cobblestone streets to get lost down, where you will find the best shops, gardens, restaurants, and monuments.  Although it's easy to get lost in Rome even with a map, put it down and release some of the pressure of having to be somewhere. 

Somewhere in Rome

Note: To find the true beauty in Rome, wander through the city as if you really were on vacation.